I am not one of those ‘class mothers’ who attends every party, PTO event, and nose-picking that takes place at school. I could be, now, in the off-season, but my son insists that he doesn’t want me there. Is he embarrassed? Probably. I guess that’s normal, though, right? 

It may very well be the embarrassment factor that makes him resistant to have me in his class. Or it may be the fact that he can’t be ‘himself’ when I’m there. Or at least the Thomas that he becomes once he plunks his little Converse sneakers on those school bus steps.  You see, my little sweetheart is me… me at 40. Except he’s 7. He shouldn’t have the snark, sarcasm and ‘who-gives-a-shit’ attitude of a perimenopausal woman.

And yet, he does.

And it’s all my fault.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Thomas is a completely different person when he’s with me. He KNOWS I know his tricks. He KNOWS I’m not going to let him get away with all kinds of kid backtalk and I don’t condone him being a Mr. BossyPants. Our relationship is such that I encourage his independence and identity-seeking behavior as long as it doesn’t hinder my parenting. I’m the mother, which, by definition, means I’m in charge. We’re very clear on that. I tell him all the time… as long as I’m older than he is, I’m the boss. If the day comes that he is older than me, well… then we’ll renegotiate.

I may not be ALLOWED to come into his classroom for parties, but I CAN drop off cupcakes or cookies. “You can bring in cookies for our party but YOU HAVE TO LEAVE THEM IN THE OFFICE!

Ok, fine.

Last week I tried a new recipe for sugar cookies (the kind of dough you roll out and cut with all the cute cookie cutters you’ve accumulated even though you never make cookies like this) from Mark Bittman‘s How to Cook Everything (excellent book…I encourage you all to buy this one).  I whipped up a batch of Royal Icing using meringue powder, as suggested by my dear Judy.   That evening, after a quick dinner of Polenta with Gorgonzola and Baby Bellas, Thomas was schooled in the art of cookie decorating. 

Or more accurately, we schooled each other.  He learned about piping icing and making pretty marble designs and I learned about predicting where he’ll leave the icing bags, exactly when the icing will start to ooze out the top of the bag due to uneven squeezing, and how I’ll clean up the sugar sprinkles he’ll accidentally dump on the table and floor.

He mastered the polka dot effect and actually handled the pastry bag quite well.  He had a few criticisms regarding the consistency of some of the colors of icing.  I told him he can mix the next batch.  He said no, thank you. 

Thomas thought using a toothpick to make hearts was the coolest technique ever!   Notice the tongue implying deep concentration.

 

We made and decorated about 2 dozen cookies which Thomas has been enjoying each school day for snack.  This is probably my favorite of the night.

I’ll be making and decorating more cookies on Monday and bagging them up for each of Thomas’ classmates.  On Tuesday I’ll deliver them to school and leave them in the office as instructed.  Unless I feel like adding one more thing to the list of things my kid will eventually discuss with a therapist.  Then I’ll bring them right to his class!

P.S.  I won’t really do anything to embarrass my sweetheart!  I’ll be a good mommy. 

P.P.S.  I will gladly make and decorate custom cookies for your party, event, kid’s class, etc.  Email me (afarmgirl4ever at yahoo dot com) or contact me on Facebook for info on pricing and yes, I’ll ship if necessary!